WHITNEY'S HOUSE
"Hey, are you even gonna try
to have fun tonight?"
The voice rattles Alex. He turns
sharply and finds Jason standing to his left, a Corona bottle in his right
hand.
"I am," Alex says, though even to
his own ears it sounds horribly unconvincing. "I'm just sorta trying to
chill tonight, you know?"
"You've been doing an awful lot of
'chilling' lately, dude. C'mon, party it up a little! Go a little nuts
tonight."
Alex's discomfort becomes immediately
apparent.
Jason leans in closer, wanting to
lower his voice but not able to do so very much thanks to the music. "How've
you been? I mean, the last time I saw you--"
"I've been okay," Alex says with
a shrug. "Thinking a lot, I guess."
"Yeah?" Jason's lips curl around
the tip of the beer bottle as he takes a swig. Alex tries not to focus
on it but finds himself unable to do so. It does seem to him, though, that
Jay is trying to figure out what to say next.
"Have you figured anything out?"
he asks finally. "Like ... I don't know ... You feeling any better about
this whole thing?"
"Kinda. I mean, it's like I've gotta
figure out my whole life now or something--"
"Huh? I can't hear you!"
Alex moves in closer to repeat himself,
and he feels an electrifying tingle as he speaks, his lips just inches
away from brushing against Jason's ear. "I was saying, it's kinda like
I have to figure out my whole life now -- like I've gotta make these huge
decisions about who I wanna be and stuff."
"Yeah, I can imagine," Jason nods.
"Look, bro, I'm behind you 100 percent, like I said before. If you wanna
talk or just have someone to hang out with or whatever, I'm totally here."
He gives Alex's shoulder a squeeze.
The touch sends that same thrill
through Alex again. He can remember the feel of Jason's hands on him that
night ... almost two years ago now. For that instant, everything was right.
Everything was going to turn out perfectly.
And then it all got shot to hell,
of course. But the unbelievable sensations of that moment -- the sensations
he had thought he would never feel again -- have stayed with Alex, and
he's called on them more times than he can even remember. If only that
feeling would stay. If only ...
He looks up at Jason, meeting his
eyes -- so supportive, dazzling with kindness and intelligence and that
crazy spark of humor. That's everything I want.
He's everything I want.
And suddenly, that long-ago night
and that perfect moment don't feel so far away anymore.
Alex swallows hard and reaches his
hand up to touch Jason's cheek.
END OF EPISODE #224
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